Our Desire to be Filled

Then the master of the house in a rage commanded his servant, ‘Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in here the poor and the crippled,  the blind and the lame.’ The servant reported, ‘Sir, your orders have been carried out and still there is room.’ The master then ordered the servant, ‘Go out to the highways and hedgerows and make people come in that my home may be filled. Lk 14:21-23


The man, in a rage, commanded the servants to go find people, people of any sort to fill his house. He originally invited people who he wanted to come, to fill his home. Those people rejected him, they declined his invitation. Therefore, he was angry, he was hurt, he was rejected and lonely, and desperately desired to fill his home. Therefore, he sends servants out to find people to fill his home. 

We desperately desire to be filled. Day in and day out we are searching and trying to fill ourselves up, turning anywhere but to God - yet does it not say in scripture "come to me and I will give you life."

Jesus answered and said to her, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again; but whoever drinks the water I shall give will never thirst; the water I shall give will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” Jn 4:13-14

I'm currently reading a book called captivating and it talks about women hiding, in these places we hide, we are searching. We are searching for God, we are searching for answers, we are searching for fulfillment. 

I know I turn to many places to try and be fulfilled: social media, friends, ministry, work, school, exercise. Some people turn to drugs, alcohol, pornography, sex, food, endless dating relationships, etc. But when we turn to these things, when we fill our lives with them it is because we are desperately trying to find fulfillment. We are trying to satisfy the craving we have to love and be loved in return. 

My dear friends, the man in the gospel today desperately wanted his house to be full, and just as he wanted to be full, so do we. I encourage all of us to turn to Christ in our desire to be fulfilled. Seek him in your day to day life. When you see yourself checking social media, eating food, desiring a drink, longing for your phone to buzz, reaching out to others, first ask yourself - am I doing this because I am desiring Jesus? Am I trying to fulfill my desire for time with Jesus, something infinite with something finite?
Make Jesus a part of your life. Look for him in your day. Ask yourself: how is Jesus showing me he loves me today?
Jesus, I desperately desire to be filled by you. Fill me up, and further reveal to me the depth of your love for me. May I always seek you first, help me to seek you when I feel lonely, when I long to be satisfied and fulfilled. 


Where are you seeking to satisfy your desire to be full?

A Sunday Reflection

Today's Gospel really struck me, and God once again reminded of his love and presence in my life.

At that time, Jesus came to Jericho and intended to pass through the town. 
Now a man there named Zacchaeus,
who was a chief tax collector and also a wealthy man,
was seeking to see who Jesus was;
but he could not see him because of the crowd,
for he was short in stature. 
So he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore tree in order to see Jesus,
who was about to pass that way.
When he reached the place, Jesus looked up and said,
"Zacchaeus, come down quickly,
for today I must stay at your house." 
And he came down quickly and received him with joy. 
When they all saw this, they began to grumble, saying,
"He has gone to stay at the house of a sinner." 
But Zacchaeus stood there and said to the Lord,
"Behold, half of my possessions, Lord, I shall give to the poor,
and if I have extorted anything from anyone
I shall repay it four times over."
And Jesus said to him,
"Today salvation has come to this house
because this man too is a descendant of Abraham. 
For the Son of Man has come to seek
and to save what was lost." (Lk 19:1-10)

I'm also currently reading Captivating. This is a book about being a woman and how God created woman to be. In this book they explain 3  desires of a woman's heart - 1. to be romanced 2. to play an irreplaceable role in a great adventure 3. to unveil beauty are the three. So when I heard the Gospel I was struck by verse 4 "so he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore tree in order to see Jesus". Zacchaeus desired Jesus so much that he ran and climbed a tree just in order to see him. 

As human we reflect God, the desires of a woman's heart not only are part of who women are, but also reveals to us the desires of God's heart as well. Women desire to be romanced, God also desires to be romanced. Jesus pursued Zacchaeus' heart and when he is running and climbing to see Jesus he is running to his encounter with the Lord - as Father said in mass today he is experiencing his conversion. 

SO my point is - we should all be desiring Jesus as Zacchaeus did. We should be running after him and climbing trees to see him. We should be pursuing him because in this very moment he is pursuing us with all he has and all he is - thus we need to reciprocate this. Jesus desires a relationship with us, and he is already pursuing us, thus we need to begin to pursue him, to seek him out, to allow him to love us and care for us, trusting and knowing that he is the one, the one and only who will satisfy any and every desire of our hearts, for his love is enough for us. 

Praise him! 

God bless & happy Sunday

The Choice: Simple Life or Chaos

Yesterday I went for a run. It was so great, and this week has been so great. I went home early from work, I've actually gotten a substantial amount of sleep, so I'm not feeling ridiculously tired -it's quite glorious actually. But back to my run - I went to Antrim park, which is a little park in Columbus that is attached to the Olentangy trail, which is a paved path that runs through Columbus along the river, and people run, walk, and bike down it. Antrim is one of my favorite parks to run at because there's a pond with a stone path around it, and I love running around the pond, the path is much softer than pavement so it always feels good to run there. Going into my run yesterday I had the intention of running 3 miles. One loop around the pond is 1.2 miles, so I did that and then I started down the trail. As I was running down the trail I took in my surroundings, and this part runs right along 315, which is one of the freeways in Columbus - so on one side of me I had the busy noisy freeway, with cars zipping by rushing from point A to point B. On the other side of me was the woods. The quiet, beautiful, peaceful, blissful woods.  And I was right in the middle of it all. As I looked at this, I realized how we have a choice in our lives. We can choose a simple life, a quiet life, a peaceful life, or we can choose the chaotic life, where we don't have enough time to take care of our bodies.

There is of course a balance between the too. We should fill our lives with good things: school, homework, mass, good friends, prayer, exercise, healthful diets and cooking our meals, but we should not fill our lives so full that we cannot afford to get enough sleep, to take a breath every now and then and just be.

Something the Lord is often teaching me is the importance of just being. If we never take time to just be, we simply do, and do and do and do and go go go. And when we do and go, we get burnt out. We run out of energy. This is not what we want. We want to be able to consistently serve the Lord well, and ensure that our lives always always always bring glory to his name.

So I ask you - which way of life do you choose? one of simplicity, or one of chaos? Will you choose to just be or will you always do?

Remember, if we do not care for ourselves, and our bodies God cannot use us to our fullest potential.

Monday Memo: Identity

Last  night we had our second girls night at youth group. Our first girls night we talked about gratitude, and being thankful for all the beautiful gifts God gives us each and every day of our lives. So this time we decided to talk about God as our ever loving Father, and how our unchanging identity is as his daughters. How beautiful is this - how blessed are we to have a Father who loves us so much. I remember being so struck the first time it really hit me that God created us out of the goodness of his heart. He had absolutely no need to create us, but out of his goodness he created us, and he loves us so much. It gets me every time.

In the gospel today Jesus picked his 12 Apostles. The 12 men he would take under his wing in a special way to form them and build them into leaders of what is now the Christian faith. But before he did this Jesus went off to the mountains to pray.

             Jesus went up to the mountain to pray, and he spent the night in prayer to God. (Lk6:12)

Jesus spent time talking to his Father, to our Father before taking any action. This is how the communicated with each other, that the will of the Father may truly be done. 

As the mere humans we are, prayer is crucial, is vital to who we are, to our Christian identity. This is how we develop a personal and intimate relationship with Christ. This is how we come to know who we are and who we are supposed to be, and what we are supposed to do. Praise him. Praise God for our identity as his daughter, as his son, and for that identity to never, ever be changed. It is the one constant in our lives. God will always be there. Praise him. He is our unchanging source of life, spend time with him this week!

In Christ! 

Monday Memo: Where's Your Treasure?

"For where your heart is there also will your treasure be." Luke12:34

Jesus has been so good to me lately, clearly pursuing my heart and swooning me, sweeping me off my feet and truly showing me how is the one and only who can truly satisfy every desire and longing my heart has for love. 

Today he reminded me of this verse - that where you heart is there also is your treasure. We ought not store up thins on the earth, but spend out lives serving God and loving others so that each person has an opportunity to encounter the love of Christ. And this is how we place our heart, our treasure in the hands of God - by making all we do be for the glory of his name. Pray for each person we encounter, knowing that we crossed their path for a reason. Love each person where they're at - love the sinner, hate the sin. Unite your day and all you do in it to Christ who wants to help you and who is with you. 

Remember, in him is our true home. Jesus, help us find our home in your most sacred heart. 

Monday Memo

Rejoice always. 

Pray without ceasing.

Give thanks always

for it is the will of God

in Christ Jesus.

 - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Jesus is constantly speaking to us, and seeking to win over our hearts. The past few weeks Jesus has been placing a theme of gratitude in my prayer and in my daily life. I find myself constantly looking for what I'm thankful for, and asking myself 'how is God revealing His love for me today?' Yesterday I went to adoration, and the last part of this verse was the Gospel proclamation yesterday, so I looked it up in my bible, and was struck by this whole part. 

Rejoice always, pray always, give thanks always. But the funny thing is - these are all tied together. If we give thanks always, we are looking for how God is loving us, thus we are praying always - and if we are looking at how well God is loving us then it is quite easy to rejoice. Pray, give thanks, rejoice. 

Happy Monday friends! and God bless you!

Rain Drops Dancing on the Street

As I sit here working on a gratitude talk, a rain storm has started here in Columbus, and I find myself pausing to watch the rain. We have an attic fan in our house, so we have that one bringing in the cool, rain-scented air. My roommate and I sit here working and continually sigh of happiness and contentment with the weather.

A warm cup of tea. A good book. My journal. My bible. My favorite pen. Good music.

Sometimes we take the little things for granted, or we get annoyed by the inconvenience rain may cause us. However, other times it is so clear, so easy to see God's presence working in our lives. A friend posted on facebook that a child told her she was beautiful, and another told her she had beautiful hair - Jesus gave her a little extra loving through little children today.

I work in a hospital, and I try to look for Jesus when I'm there - I mean, he is the Divine Physician, so he's clearly present in a hospital setting. One time I saw him through a father loving his sick daughter. I see him through a son loving his father. Those are the 'easy' ones per say. Some of the hard ones have been when I am with a patient who starts acting at. One time a patient hopped out bed and started running down the halls, going into patients rooms, and through the help of other staff we were able to get him into bed, and calm him down. After this night, I left feeling a little distressed, but then as I was driving home, I asked myself - where was Jesus in this situation? I realized then that Jesus was present in me... this patient can be seen as the follower of Christ rebelling against Jesus, and lashing out on Jesus - where I am in Jesus, loving this person regardless of him hurting me, and staying with him through the hard time. Jesus does that through us.

Seeing Jesus in all scenarios is challenging, and it's something we learn. "I have learned the secret of being well fed and of being hungry, of living in abundance and of being in need." Phil. 4:12

Gratitude, eucharisteo - thanksgiving and joy - is not something found over night, but something we learn in a slow, life-long process. We start with the easy, and as it's easier to give thanks in the easy times, we begin to look for thanksgiving opportunities in the hard too.

May we rejoice in the little things, the rain drops dancing on the street.