There are two things that I have learned over the past three years that I absolutely love. These lessons came with learning about Catholicism, in my own journey, you may have learned them another way.
One - we are made for happiness:
Although man can forget God or reject him, He never ceases to call every man to seek him, so as to find life and happiness. (CCC #30)
Two - We all desire to love and to be loved. It's just how God made us.
Lately, I seem to have noticed more and more how people are not as happy and how people aren't loving. Often times, I find myself frustrated because I see a lack of love and an increase of self-centeredness. It strikes me more and more each time I think about myself over another, or place myself on a higher level than another person.
Today, my parents were talking about taking a little vacation. They never really had a honeymoon when they got married, so they just want to do something special, they've been together for a total of 25 years, married for 22, which is beautiful, and honestly, it seems to be rare these days. Anyway, as they were talking about their little vacation, I found myself thinking "ugh they don't deserve a vacation. they don't work nearly as hard as I have been." But who was I kidding - seriously, my mom had 4 kids. My dad works full time, always has, and he has always worked to provide for our family. My mom was a stay home mom, heck that's harder than being a working mom, I think, because there's less income, and she was with us rascals all day, but it paid off since we turned out to be pretty decent specimen. My point is that I was so focused on thinking about me, myself, and I that I didn't think about how hard my parents have worked to provide me with all that I need, and helped to form me into the person I am. They deserve a vacation, without any kids. Just the two of them celebrating the milestone of sending two kids through high school and surviving, while fighting many other battles.
That's just one example where I thought of myself over others. There are other times, but that's not exactly my point. Now if you read the article I posted above, you'll now the direction this is going.
I was never really around people who openly talked about their sexuality, the idea of same sexes being attracted to one another was a rather foreign idea to me. Maybe it was just because I'm good at being oblivious, or maybe it was because there just wasn't much of it where I grew up (farm country). Anywho, something I've realized is just how much each person is a person, and they deserve to be loved.
I had a really interesting conversation with a friend the other day. Being in a conservative Catholic community, there are many people who are Pro-life (obviously) and people who kind of hmm I don't the word, but I feel like "gayness" for lack of better terms is frowned upon. I obviously understand why. It's against the Church. God made man and woman for a reason, and with being pro-life - well all I have to say is a life is a life, no matter how small. However, what my friend and I talked about was how those who work with pro-choice groups honestly think they are doing the right thing to help the women they are working with. The women they are working with probably feel trapped, and that's why they're seeking their options. The people who work for abortion clinics, etc are people too. I feel like they're almost looked at as 'monsters' (for lack of better term) because they want women to feel like they have a choice.
And as for the gay/lesbian community - well, they are people too, who desire to love and be loved. When I think of this battle being fought in America, well I think about the times I feel lonely, and I just want someone to love me, to hold me, to comfort me. I think of those times when I long for human comfort, and touch. And in thinking in this way, I've learned to see how they are people too, I know that sounds weird, mean, judgemental, whatever you want to call it, but I'm being honest here.
My question - doesn't everyone want to be loved?
Then, why is it so hard for us to love our brothers and sisters who are pro-choice, or support gay/lesbian?
Brothers and sisters, this has been something weighing so heavy on my heart. We're all sinners, and I guess well, I wanted to remind all how all people are in need of love.
I remember when I first came to St. Patrick's Veritas youth group winter mission trip my freshman year of high school. I remember being welcomed into a community of love, of life. There was so much joy, so much love. In middle school, I was teased, a lot. People I didn't know said I was gay because I never had a boyfriend (though I had plenty of crushes). I had countless days where I came home crying because a friend told me she didn't want to be friends with me anymore. I remember being called a bitch, a backstabber, and other mean things. And as a freshman in high school, coming into that community, so filled with love, I was grateful, grateful to know so many people who loved God, and loved me too. I want the world to be like that - a community of love.
If someone comes to me and tells me they find their same sex attractive, I want to embrace them with open arms. I don't want to try to change them. I want to love them. I want them to know they are loved. I want them to know God, and know his love - and chances are, if this person has been placed in my life, then I'm supposed to love them, with the love of Christ within me.
If someone comes to me and tells me they are pregnant and considering an abortion, I want to be able to embrace them with open arms. I want to be able to love my sister in that moment. I want to be a listening ear for her. Most importantly - I want her to feel love, to feel safe, to not feel judged, but loved.
Let us be a people of love, a people who embraces each person with whatever their challenge/struggle may be. If there is a person in our life, chances are they are there for us to love. I know I'm not perfect at this, I know there will be times when I'll jump to conclusions, but brothers and sisters, can we work together to become a people of love, rather than a people of judgement? (And I'm not saying people are judging, but sometimes it comes off that way when we desire mainly to change people) Let us love people with the love God has placed within us. Let us love.
I just want to leave you with this - Mark 12:28-34
One of the scribes, when he came forward and heard them disputing and saw how well he had answered them, asked him, “Which is the first of all the commandments?”Jesus replied, “The first is this: ‘Hear, O Israel! The Lord our God is Lord alone!You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.' The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” The scribe said to him, “Well said, teacher. You are right in saying, ‘He is One and there is no other than he.’ And ‘to love him with all your heart, with all your understanding, with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself’ is worth more than all burnt offerings and sacrifices.”And when Jesus saw that [he] answered with understanding, he said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.” And no one dared to ask him any more questions
As I was adding that Gospel passage, the word understanding stood out to me. Here's a little blurb I found on understanding - I think it sums up what I really want my message to get across tonight.
Understanding is using your mind to think clearly, paying attention to see the meaning of things. An understanding mind gives you insights and wonderful ideas. An understanding heart gives you empathy and compassion for others. Understanding is the power to think and learn and also to care.
You are practicing understanding when you …
- Concentrate and pay close attention
- Reflect on the meaning of things
- See the whole picture
- Resist distractions
- Put yourself in other people’s shoes
- Forgive others and yourself when you make mistakes
May we grow in love, and understanding. May we seek the intercession of our blessed Mother, Mary, Help of Christians, to grow! I believe in striving after this - we will see a greater happiness in this world, that we may be able to serve in joy, and in love!
