I don't know about you, but the last week has been rough on my heart. I know I recently wrote a rather popular post on embracing singleness, which I stand by, but I'm just trying to be real with y'all - the last week or so has been rough, in regards to my singleness. I think it's due to what one of my professors would call spring fever.
Spring does things to us, it makes us come alive. The whole world is filled with new life as flowers bloom and leaves grow, greenery returns, wedding season approaches and new dating relationships come to fruition, proposals occur, people graduate... and sometimes our heart strings are tugged - as excited as we may be for our peers. I know this has been my experience - people ask me what's new, how's life and I'm just plugging along. I just finished what is said to be the hardest year of nursing school. I am overwhelmed by the number of women I have in my life to call sister. But aside from that, there's nothing new - no new relationships, I have job lined up for the summer so that's nice. I have some goals for the summer, which is good. But life is just steady, constant, plugging along, nothing new to report. Which, is kind of nice. However, it would be nice to have a relationship to report because in my plan for my life I would be in a relationship currently, or very soon... but I don't know what the Lord has in store in regards to that aspect of my life. I have confidence that he has a plan for that area of my life, I just don't know what the plan is and I'm not particularly fond of not being in control of situations.
Anywho, I was taking some of these thoughts and feelings to prayer this week. Seeking to surrender the desires of my heart to the Lord. But also asking him to let me know He is near. Which he did, more than I could possibly have dreamed. The Lord has spoken this to me through a dear sister, just in the way He made His presence known in her day, and the way she shared that joy with me. In the community of brothers and sisters he has given me and the love and respect we all have for one another. In my personal prayer and the way he has been speaking to me in his word. In the readings today at mass - for God is greater than our hearts and knows everything. 1 Jn 3:20. Where he reminded me that he knows everything and I have no need to worry about anything. But most of all in the way He loved me - because he knows the song of my heart - through the beautiful sunset, a bright moon, seeing the stars, a relaxing & quiet evening...
Though we doubt and fail him daily, our God is a god who knows us and who loves us! He knows what we need before we ask Him. He provides for our every need.
Whether you're on cloud 9, down in the dumps, or chugging along know that you are not alone and you have a Father in heaven who loves you more than you could possibly imagine. He is watching over you and seeing to your every need. And there are men and women all over the earth in a similar spot to where you currently rest. Take hope that you are not alone! Praise the God who knows the number of hairs on our head, for he formed us in our mother's womb.
